It’s just like figuring out what your clients want!
Oh, except that your baby can’t talk, or pay you for your time, or give you pointers, or guide you in any way, shape or form.
So what is a mother to do?
Throw away the books.
STOP yourself from typing into Google (yeah, right).
Smile and nod when people give you advice.
Halt the mad obsession with figuring it all out.
Who Is My Baby and What Does My Baby Want?
For the first three months of Prince Brody’s life, these are the questions I was asking myself – amidst excruciating breastfeeding pain and a wacked-out sleeping schedule. As a new mom, I was quickly thrown into a life I knew NOTHING about!
Call my little guy particular. Call him demanding. Call him fussy. Any word will do. The truth is, he wasn’t – and isn’t – easy to figure out. Not then, not now. I know some moms will claim that within a few weeks they had their babies all figured out. Okay, sure. Maybe. Ask them if they still have those babies figured out at 2 months. 3 months. 4 months.
Our little ones are constantly changing and growing up. What one day brings, the next day doesn’t. And just as soon as we think we’ve cracked the baby code, they change again.
Trying to Figure Out Your Baby is Like Trying to Figure Out Your Most Misfit Client
You know that client who you just never “clicked” with? The one who constantly changed his mind throughout the course of the project? The one who couldn’t explain herself well? The one who, no matter how hard you tried, you simply couldn’t “get”?
Take yourself back to that experience. If you’re anything like me, you eventually said to yourself, “I’m never going to be able to please this client. This is never going to be a smooth working relationship. I’m just not the right person for this job.”
And those statements may just apply to you and your baby!
Think about it…
There will be times when you say to yourself, “I can’t please this guy!”
There will be times when you say to yourself, “This is anything but a smooth relationship.”
But, there most certainly WON’T be times when you say to yourself, “I’m just not the right person for this job.”
Quite the contrary because you’re always the right person for the job. In fact, you’re the only person for the job. Even when it’s hard. Even when it feels impossible. Even when you’re holding on by a thread. There’s no one better. You’re it mama.
Why You Don’t Need to Figure Your Baby Out
Forget about figuring out your baby. You don’t need to. Because you’ve got something way better than some magic equation to solve all your problems – it’s called Motherly Instinct.
Sure, at one time or another, whether we’re consciously trying to figure out our babies or not, as moms we’ll think we’ve done it. We’ve cracked the code! We’ve got the answer! And then the next thing we know, everything is different again. The process starts over. We’ve come around full circle.
Cut it out! Stop trying. Have fun with the fact that your little one is a total mystery. Run with your instincts instead. If you’re trying out something new and it just doesn’t feel quite right, stop. If your little one “usually” does things a certain way but today it’s the total opposite, laugh it off, adjust, roll with the punches. Don’t get your panties in a knot! Get used to it. Things are inevitably going to change a million times over and you’ve got a looooong time to go, Mama.
There’s nothing, and I mean NOTHING, like a mother’s instinct. But you’ve gotta use it.
Take a Lesson from Your Motherly Instinct and Get a Little Business Instinct
I think most of us take our instincts for granted. Or, if you’re anything like me, you have great instincts but you don’t listen when they come a knockin’!
Change that. In every part of your world. You’ll be happy you did.
Sleep training just not feeling like the right answer for your baby? Put an end to it.
Does that new lead sound like an absolute nightmare? Don’t move forward.
Think your little one is sick? Make a move.
Feel like now is the time to bring a new product to market? Do it.
Instinct is a powerful thing.
So forget about figuring it out.
Follow your gut instead.